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For me, Burning Man is some parts magical and some parts frustrating and some parts blissful and some parts devastating, just like everything that regular life is – except also dusty. There is so much gushing with positivity around Burning Man that I feel almost embarrassed to admit that two years in a row, I had both ups and downs to my burn.

Burning Man 2015

I do truly believe that for some people, Burning Man is a non-stop highlight reel. But for me and many others, it’s a rollercoaster. And when it comes to a festival that worships at the altar of catharsis, I feel an even stronger urge than usual to show you not just the beauty and the bliss, but also the challenges and the exasperations. I learn more about myself and the world from the moments that challenge me than the ones that peacefully pass me by, so for that I am eternally grateful to these struggles from Black Rock City 2015.

Burning Man 2015

The Weather

The weather was tough in 2015. Here’s — and it barely crossed my mind. The desert, however, is a whole other challenge. You know how a lot of people feel about nails on a chalkboard? That is how dry skin feels to me. With my skin cracking from dry air, my hair caked in dust and my eyes burning red from the wind, I crave showers like I never before have in my life. It might only last a moment before the next dust storm, but that cleansing ritual resets my soul and sets me up for a day of happiness.

Burning Man 2015

Burning Man 2015

Both years I’ve gone to Burning Man, I arrived under the impression that I’d be able to shower a few times throughout the week at my camp. Both years, that has not happened due to technical failures, misunderstandings… whatever. Moving forward, I know that being able to take a brief shower every two days is absolutely essential to my happiness at the burn, and I’m going make it happen either by investing in renting my own RV, or joining a large, organized theme camp that offers a reliable camp shower.

Burning Man 2015

Camp Clashes

It kind of kills me to write that once again, not feeling like I fit in with my camp was my biggest heartbreak of Burning Man.

In 2013, I camped with a group of college friends and an established theme camp of veteran burners. In 2015, I camped with my boyfriend and a thrown-together group of friends-of-friends brand new to Black Rock City. We formed a three RV and one tent caravan, and all met for the first time the night before the burn. There was no planning email thread, no group discussion, no conference call ahead of time. Anyone who has seen my color-coded excel sheets and detailed planning calendars is probably picturing me going into a stress coma right now, but I was actually amazingly unfazed and after a summer of hectic travel planning, ready to just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Burning Man 2015

In some ways, the whole thing added up to a pretty beautiful organized chaos – we shared some gorgeous meals, made some amazing connections, and had an absolute blast partying together. In other ways, it was straight chaos. There’s no way to sugarcoat it: I wasn’t on the same page with my camp when it came to the cleanliness and eco-friendliness of our camp at what is admirably the largest , I realize that yes, I made a lot of the same mistakes twice. And that’s frustrating. But you know what? I also learned from several of them, too. I lived more in the moment. I thought more about the activity I was doing or the person I was talking to or the party I was at than the ten others that I wasn’t. I felt close and connected to both my boyfriend who I camped with and my best friend who I traveled with. I put less pressure on myself. I understood more what I wanted out of the week and I knew how to get it. I felt confident and at ease. I did my own thing — and I loved it.

Still, if at this point you’re thinking I’m a whiny baby who ran around shivering and fussing over my hair and nagging my camp and wondering why I continue to torture myself… you’re not totally wrong. Ha! Just kidding! I adore Burning Man. It’s one of the most creatively stimulating, emotionally empowering, ideologically inspiring, and wildly fun experiences I’ve ever had. Is it a rollercoaster? Heck yes.

And I can’t wait to get in line for the next ride.

Source: alexinwanderland.com